As most of you know getting a visa is a pretty bureaucratic and monotonous process. However, attaining a Russian visa surely, puts all these stereotypes to rest. The usual applciation process contains:
- Napkin numbered one to one hundred,
- Several old Russian grannies;
- A cramped outside pagoda;
- A grey drizzly Berlin morning;
- A strict no smiling or laughing policy;
- A former KGB bureaucrat;
- Lots of chaos;
- Inefficient time management; and
- The paperwork, of course.
After arriving one hour and a half before the Consulate opened, names were crickle crackled onto said napkin as numbers 40 and 41. The napkin was in the process of disintegrating into white pulp, due to the light drizzle. Amid of the excitement, a Russian granny urged us to part ourselves from our passports, so that she could start a collection, unheard of, I hear you cry, in any other bureaucratic process. However, this is no normal bureaucratic process/is bureaucratic even the right word. This is Russia 101. After said napkin has passed the 100 mark, a new napkin was produced for numbers hundred onwards. While this mass of white pulp, was angrily thrust into the hands of aforementioned KGB "bureacrat", who dared to open the front door right on time.Promptly, each granny fought nail and tooth to attempt to pass their collection of ten passports to the half bewildered/half hungover looking KGB officer.
Once inside, it feels like time travel is possible. Welcome to East Berlin, July 4th 1968. A waiting number was silently allocated, except for a disapproving grunt. This waiting number was expertly placed on the magic counter "NUMBER 2", where a miserable young man took the waiting number, and placed it expertly on a pile of other waiting numbers, giving him the option to call up numbers as he pleases. Once called up (40 minutes) and a lot of confusion which number he called, the young protagonists faced their toughest test to date. The applications were handed in, and to the protagonists surprise, Brazilian passport holders do not need a visa. In the midst of having the papers for passport A thrown back at them, elation broke out, an act in stark contrast to the no smiling/laughing rule. Irked by such elation ("Was ist hier lächerlich" heavy Russian accent, please), Passport holder B's application was declared void, thrown back, and instructed to be redone for no particular reason. After the Russian Bear calmed down, the new application form was submitted, without any acknowledgement whatsoever receipts were made out for a seemingly random figure.
The LADS continued their adventure in the Consulate, proceeding to counter one. Payment of the fees were heavily handicapped by the corrupt nature of the state, an unwillingness to accept foreign debit cards, and a fear of cash. Receipt of payment was returned to magic counter "NUMBER 2" and the application was miraculously complete.
Picking up passport plus visa included repeating as many steps as aforementioned.
No comments:
Post a Comment